The new semester has arrived, and new challenges and decisions will face you in the weeks to come. Luckily, the astrological portents can help you confront these difficulties.
January 20-February 18:
Aquarius
February 19-March 20:
Pisces
March 21-April 19:
Aries
April 20-May 20:
Taurus
May 21-June 20:
Gemini
June 21-July 22:
Cancer
July 23-August 22:
Leo
August 23-September 22:
Virgo
September 23-October 22:
Libra
October 23-November 21:
Scorpio
November 22-December 21:
Sagittarius
December 22-January 19:
Capricorn
Aquarius
Your co-star has been rather harsh on you lately. You’ve come to this column to ease the tension and see if the stars may align to give you some fortunate news. That is not what I am here for, Aquarius. Listen to your co-star. It is always 100% accurate.
Pisces
Today you have had Diner three and a half times. That is less than ideal, but you do not care in the slightest. Honestly, kind of a power move. You have to respect that move, and it gives you the newfound confidence to go through the week strongly.
Aries
This is a positive day for you, Aries. People say “hi” to you who have not before as you walk across Martin’s Way. You give them a head nod and keep trodding along. Interesting move, Aries.
Taurus
The effort has really been there, Taurus! Unfortunately, you keep getting distracted from your work by Twitter, which is a relentless impediment to your unrelenting focus. Maybe just take a nap. Try to realign the chakras, and rejuvenate your body to keep going on with the day. I believe in you, Taurus.
Gemini
The stars have aligned and you are feeling the urge to cook today for some reason. You feel like Picasso in the kitchen, no one can possibly stop your genius. Your food is not amazing, but you are still a cooking fiend in the common room, which brightens up everyone’s day. Maybe once you are done, take a step back to do some work and catch up.
Cancer
You are feeling extra nosy lately, Cancer. You want to know everything that is going on in everyone’s life, but you haven’t exactly contemplated what is going on with your own. Woah. Give yourself a vibe check, and figure out what’s happening in your own life.
Leo
You are in an empowering, boastful state of mind currently (but let us be real, when are you not). You have extreme confidence, but remember, you do not own the place. No one does. Just take a step back, quit looking at yourself in the mirror, and appreciate others. I have warned you in the past, take it to heart this time.
Virgo
You have been on edge lately. You really need a weekend and you need to mellow out a bit. However, I like the intensity, and that has made you very studious and productive as of late. Make sure to get some extra sleep, and clear your mind.
Libra
The moon is with you today. This makes you feel extra happy and kind to everyone, almost too benevolent. Make sure to keep this positive mindset but do not be manipulated too quickly. You are riding a wave that you think may never come down, keep on riding it.
Scorpio
You have been grinding lately, and you are overtired, overstressed, overworked. Take some tips from Aries and take time to not do any work and regain your positivity with life and with school. But I have no right to tell you what is going on in your life. Who am I to tell you this? You can choose to listen or not, but as the mouthpiece of the stars, listening to it is in your best interest.
Sagittarius
You are feeling a sneaky sort of adventurous. I have to call you out on it, this is strange. But I can’t tell you what to do. Choose your own path, but make sure to choose the right one. Life is like a sandwich, Sagittarius. Keep this in mind.
Capricorn
Wow, you are doing amazing this week, Capricorn. Truly fantastic work. One piece of advice, don’t take this horoscope for truth. I am just some random person sitting behind a computer rapidly typing whatever nonsense I want to, frankly just because I can. And this propaganda is for you to take as truth. You can choose to listen or not.
